I am tired. Really tired. Like, I want to sleep for a few days tired. I'm tired of working out every day. I'm tired of making food, cleaning up after it, and then making food again as soon as I turn around. I'm waiting for some water to boil for my lunch and my eyelids are practically closing themselves.
Why am I so tired? I don't understand. I thought this program would give me more energy, not less. Maybe it has given me more energy and I just haven't noticed it? Maybe I need more than 8 hours of sleep? Maybe it's the fact that my daughter is just randomly saying the word "no" to everything? (We're in a bit of a difficult period at the moment...)
I think now that we've passed the halfway mark, I'm looking ahead to life after the PCP and "borrowing some trouble." I'm already worried that I'm not internalizing this stuff as much as I need to if I'm going to continue living a healthy life after these 90 days are up. I'm still not immune to the siren song of sugar like I had hoped to be. I guess it really has a hold on me. I'm taking comfort in the fact that I'm much less tempted than I used to be, and I'm going to have faith that if I continue to resist, I'll become even more powerful over my cravings.
But the exercise -- am I really going to keep this up after 90 days? I know I shouldn't be worrying about it now, but there it is. I still don't really like it. I like the feeling of satisfaction afterwards, but every workout has at least a few moments where I am completely hating it. What is wrong with me? Shouldn't I be feeling more positive about it by now?
Arrgh, sorry for the brutal honesty. But trying to be transparent and thorough in the hopes that writing some of this stuff down will help me see through it. I'd love to hear how the rest of you are dealing with any negative thoughts!
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Well, I'm only on day 16, but for what it's worth, i try not to think ahead: day 42 or 87 or any day after PCP. Otherwise it just gets too overwhelming and I think "what's the point, I'm probably going to slip up at a later date, so i might as well fail now". NOT TRUE. Just think about today. ? I'm finding it helps me a lot.
ReplyDeleteAlso, your schedule might be different, but I find if I do the workout in the morning it just knocks me out for the rest of the day. I prefer in the evening, then stretch, have a nice refreshing shower, eat and collapse into bed....
I'm right there with you, Tara. Soooo tired. The workout made me angry at many points this morning. In fact, you've inspired a blog post that I'll write when I get home this afternoon.
ReplyDeleteBut, I want you to know that I empathize and understand and am constantly wondering similar things, esp. in the food realm.
This feeling is normal and everyone goes through it. Welcome to the PCP Valley!
ReplyDeleteLouise, you're absolutely right. One day at a time.
ReplyDeleteJenny, thank you! You seem to have such a positive attitude, I want some of whatever you're having!
Patrick, that's actually a huge relief!
I'm also having some not-fun feelings about the everyday workouts. Maybe we're all feeling it now also because they've gotten longer. I don't know about you but it's taking me around 50 minutes to do the whole workout. That's pretty long!
ReplyDeleteHere's my advice: start to frame your thinking about the workouts like you do with brushing your teeth, or putting on your deodorant, or jewelry or makeup or clothes. In fact, add up the time it takes to do all those daily routines that you've always done. My guess is it'll take as long as the PCP workout, and look at how much you're getting from these workouts. So, I think just accepting it as part of what you do everyday, and not as something separate from the other things you do everyday, will help.
(though I still resent flossing and I've done it everyday for 15 years, so I haven't even quite conquered this mindset myself... but I still always floss!!)
TAra, it's like I wrote that all myself. I'M EXACTLY in the same place. tired all the time, hating that im not internalizing it and hating myself that i look forward to indulgence days. What elena said above is very accurate and i'll do just that....maybe i'll start flossing too.
ReplyDeleteExactly. So tired today and yesterday more than any other day so far!!
ReplyDeleteWhat a relief to know everyone is going through it!
I am very tired, too.
ReplyDeleteIt takes more than 50 minutes for me. I did not do my workout first thing in the morning today because I had a Yoga class. I'll do my workout later. I'm too tired to do it now (11:48 am in Japan)
I am relieved to know that everyone is feeling the same way.
Yes, start flossing, Royce! You don't want to distract from your PCP body with unhealthy teeth and gums!
ReplyDeleteIm feeling the same too! tired, hate having to do the exercises, waiting for next indulgence, and im worried about post pcp. ahh sigh. at least were all feeling this together!
ReplyDelete