OK, it's been almost 3 weeks on this plan as of today. I can hardly believe it's been such a short time, because I'm feeling so many changes already, inside and out.
I can look at myself in the mirror and see some definition in my arms, my waist is smaller, my hips are slimmer, and my legs are thinner. This is amazing, after only 3 weeks. I can feel how I'm getting stronger, by virtue of how many sets I can do of certain exercises -- I was feeling the burn a lot earlier a couple of weeks ago, but now it takes more reps to start to feel it. I am so proud of myself and my PCP teammates!
So now the paranoia sets in, because I have this funny thing about success: I'm always sure that I'm failing somehow, even if everything looks good. Today while I was swimming, here's what was going through my head:
Even though I've been walking or swimming every day, I still haven't gone back to the jumprope because my knee is still painful. I wonder if that means I won't lose any weight this week. Am I somehow doing something wrong and don't even know it? Am I measuring my food correctly? Is there just something about my body that's going to make it stop responding to these efforts?
On the one hand, I feel fairly confident that because I'm doing all the right things, the results will show. OK, so I had one bite of birthday cake. But that's not going to derail all my good efforts. (And I'm especially pleased that the bite of birthday cake was ONLY one bite -- it didn't start a descending spiral of sugar.) Whatever the results, however quickly or slowly they show up, I know that I'm eating so much better than I was a few weeks ago, and I'm exercising every single day, which is a huge improvement. I'm trying to focus on the process more than the results.
But on the other hand -- there goes that chattering voice, saying I won't be as successful as other people have been because... why? Because I can't imagine myself really being fit. I've never been in that state before in my life, and I don't know what it would feel like or look like. I'm caught in my own self-image. I'm so accustomed to failing in this area that I'm expecting it to happen again.
So what do I do about this? I think I just keep plugging ahead, doing everything to the best of my ability, weighing that food, swimming those laps (and hoping my knee gets better) and, as instructed, BLOGGING IT OUT.
Oh, and one other thing: shrimp + avocado = made for each other.
Congratulations everybody on three weeks!
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Nobody starting this really has had an image of what they look or feel like fit, or what a healthy lifestyle really DOES look like for them. That's the entire point of this. In time you'll start to see not only the healthy side of your new lifestyle, but the future of it too.
ReplyDeleteTara, you WILL be successful. I have no doubts about that!
ReplyDeleteCongrats to you, too!
PS I went swimming this morning at a local pool and LOVED it.
The negative thoughts and self-doubt are also a big part of the workout...the part you have to just push through. Tell yourself: "I'm still working out, even if I don't lose weight this week, I'm getting more fit and healthy every day. That's why I'm sticking to it. No matter if I had a bite of cake. I'm staying on track."
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you're feeling proud of yourself. Well done, Tara!
Your doing great tara!
ReplyDeleteremember it is rather impossible to not get an amazing result from all of this.Just like it is rather impossible to not get burnt if you jump into a flaming pit of fire.
CAUSE/EFFECT
If you do everything assigned to the best of your personal ability the effect will deffinately happen. It's impossible that it won't.
For some of us, our dream bodies may take a little longer than 3 months, maybe 4 , 5 or 6...But the things we are learning from this plan and the things we are doing every day are all adding up to give us the exact body and health we want. We got to take the suffering, understand it, keep on trucking.
WE WILL SEE THE RESULTS WE WANT AS LONG as we keep oooooon.
you're doing great!
cheerio
As Royce said, this isn't about wishing or faith. It's just a physics problem. Energy in vs. energy out. And you're on the winning side of the equation!
ReplyDeleteTara, you're doing great!
ReplyDeleteI think doing the PCP workout everyday is so powerful. Eating as instructed has changed us already in many ways not just physically but also mentally.
Let's stick with the program as we've been doing, then the result will follow.
You are not alone, you have us!
You guys are awesome, just awesome. Thank you so much!
ReplyDeleteWay to get these hard feelings out on the blog. I share some of the same reactions to the project. In the past I think I would almost self-sabotage because of some fear of the unknown (the unknown being the lower weight, or healthier life). It's scary, but that's why so few people actually make the effort and keep marching on, and that's why it's so inspiring and awesome that PCPers do make the commitment and get the results. Thanks for this honest post - I totally relate, but rationally I KNOW we are going to be up there on that "Complete!" page, inspiring future PCPers to take the plunge also.
ReplyDeleteBlog it out. Whew. What a relief huh?
ReplyDeleteIt's hard not to focus on the scale. I know - as do most women...
Patrick has a good notion to simply see it non-emotionally - energy in and energy out... it's hard to do as a woman in this culture when so much of our self-worth is planted in what we look like and how much we weigh.
I saw someone the other day that I hadn't seen in 10 years. She was shocked at how "good" i was looking. I felt pleased, but I also felt her anxiety about weight, as if being good means being thin. Our heads reject this but it is so hard to accept.
And not only women, of course... men have the same issues.
Hold steady. You're doing great.